Singapore Expats

I must admit if you saw the history of my life, especially people back home who are not so fortunate would be thinking that I'm being ungrateful for wanting more.
I did go to Japan on a scholarship without any obligation and because of that opportunity, my life and I reckon I myself, in terms of my point of view especially, has changed considerably.
Even though it was not an easy journey to spend most of my 20s in a foreign land, first time being abroad and being far away from my family as well, I must admit despite of the hardship I had to face when I was there and here for that matter, I reckon I would choose the same option again, esp. for the Japan part.
However, there is something I reckon I can and should do more, both in professional and private life. Only it just comes to a choice to make it seems whether I would like to be satisfied more professionally or personally. Even though it would be so perfect to have the balance but unfortunately it's not in this case.
So I've been thinking, that I probably should sacrifice one of the two and it's going to be the social life and it just has to be it seems, which I reckon considering personality-wise I'm not a loner even though had been said to be "out of the loop"(!), that is definitely something that really saddens me to give up.

Oh well, that's my case... So without further a due, at the risk of sounding like a religious organisation even though I wouldn't fancy it..here is the question how happy are you with your life?

I suppose my answer is I'm ok with my life now, but I do want more...

Happiness changes by the second, or our perceptions of what happiness should be. We all buy into the treadmill of other folks aspirations and think we have to go as far or further than them to be 'happy.'

We also have to have cash, looks, station in life, education, blah, blah bloody blah.

All rubbish of course as people can be happy without huge amounts of any of the above.

The only true happiness comes with acceptance......of what you think the limit you'll push yourself to.....

If you set a large goal........like being the MD of a huge international co, or being an eminent doc, or being rich enough to spend millions....fine....but KNOW how much effort this will take...and luck.

Then just accept that most of your life will be spent chasing the goal, and if you manage to get it, then keeping that goal.

If you think this is for you, truly think you can spend your life chasing, working really hard and most probably cutting people off at the knees if they're competition...great, good luck to you.

But me, I have chosen to know that that kind of stress would kill me and so, yes, I've chosen a 'lower road' perhaps, but it suits me.

Unfortunately, this sort of acceptance usually comes with age....in my twenties I'd have laughed in your face if you'd said I'd be sitting in the back seat...........but, each to their own.

I love to see the determination of the driven......what they'll do to get what they want, where they'll go, etc etc.........but I don't envy them. Years ago maybe, but not now.

Not sure how this relates to your question, but think what I'm trying to say is.......you won't be happy till you truly decide what makes you unhappy, then put the brakes on to stop yourself smacking your head against that unhappiness.

Totally agree that happiness changes by the second. I was truely happy till yesterday - thought it was all good - and today I'm in shambles wondering how I could have possibly f***** up something that was so good so badly

The dew on a leaf in the first cold of the morning( has gotta be back in Europe though ).

Some see it as another cold day, others may think of rainy days they do not like so much. But there's also people who look at it as were it precious diamonds of nature, take a deep breath and thank God or whomever for this natural beauty.

I have days like all of these described.

Eric

Kimi, I can't believe you remember things said in jest and take them to heart!! Firms up my resolve to work harder on you.

Not meaning to hijack Kimi, but here's a question I've always found fascinating:

Is happiness a choice?

Yes, its a choice, but sometimes its nice to wallow in self pity as well. Isn't it?

beenhere10years wrote:Not meaning to hijack Kimi, but here's a question I've always found fascinating:

Is happiness a choice?

Which reminds me of so many sales trainings, in which the self proclaimed succesfull trainer declared with the most serious facial expression: Success is a choice!!!

Eric

beenhere10years wrote:Not meaning to hijack Kimi, but here's a question I've always found fascinating:

Is happiness a choice?

good question, BH10Y.

i believe happiness is a by-product of making the right choices in life. but it cannot be pursued in its own right. it's like a shadow... you will see it if you stand in the sun.

Hi Everyone

Yesterday, in the middle of going crazy doing lunch, work, etc., I read the Sunday Times and below is the link to the website one of the professors in the article is involved in.

It was a really great read, basically it was all about whether it is possible to teach happiness. The study of happiness from psychological and medical viewpoints. Their aim is to see if psychoanalysis, of the old school (i.e. Freud etc) has any positive outcome on the subjects. Apparently much analysis turns out to be useless as it's based on getting the patient to regurgitate their horrors etc. This study, and it's no airy fairy one, done by fly by night 'positive new age' thinkers, but by establishment figures in the UK and US, flies on the premise that it IS possible to tap into happiness, even though we have been programmed, since our caveman days to use our ancient brain centre which signalled catastrophe...(Mammoth attack, wolf attack, bad weather, fight to kill etc)........so, this site they've set up..........have a read of it....

www.reflectivehappiness.com

Also, included in the article was a link to another site..........of happy young people in the UK.....peeps who've made a success of life because they are happy......

www.younglivesUK.com

Perhaps it's time we concentrated on the good instead of the bad??

Sorry, here's the correct link to the actual article.....

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/newspaper/ ... 73,00.html

sapphire wrote:Yes, its a choice, but sometimes its nice to wallow in self pity as well. Isn't it?

Meeeoooooowww!

I stay happy because I don't wanna have wrinkles hahahahahaha

beenhere10years wrote:Not meaning to hijack Kimi, but here's a question I've always found fascinating:

Is happiness a choice?

Interesting thread

My opinion is that happiness is not a choice for the simple fact, that our chemistry is tarnished by the environmental toxins, that we do not see, but breathe in on a daily basis.

One can strive for happiness and never attain it, becuase of chemical imbalance within the brain, most people live with it, have good days and bad days. those effected more than others, have no choice, every day is a bad day, all they strive for is to get back to normal, and poping pills may help, but never cures.

Some actually check out in there teens or whenever, the fact remains we don't always have a choice. Pesticides, Organic phosphorus and many other man made commerical toxins have a direct effect on our swings & roundabouts.

seriously there are more factors involved that wipe out choice for many people, but that is only my opinion of what i see around me. It is a simplistic view to say we have a choice, just like saying we are all humans. many humans have defects which eliminate choice.l

Extremely happy! Couldn't ask for a better life! \:D/\:D/