Singapore Expats

I am kind of stuck in a problem, would like to seek advice from more
mature folks (which aren't my friends).

I've been sport climbing for a while now, sort of, under an
instructor(s), and sometimes I see some people belaying perhaps the
wrong way, which may be (1) very serious mistake (not observed as of
now) or (2) mistake which MAY be potentially serious.

I don't know if I should just tell them the right way to do it --but
then they may not take it seriously since I'm not an instructor; or
if I should consult with the instructor to confirm that it's wrong,
then tell the instructor who has been making that mistake --but I may
get on the bad side of some people or may seem like some ass who likes
to make other people look bad/ backstabbing.

So...I'm always this indecisive. It sucks a lot.

How good would you feel if someone gets hurt and you didn't do anything about it.
Make sure you are right, then tell the instructir your view one-to-one. If he still gets it wrong then he is a dickhead.

If you see someone who's about to be run over by a truck, would you alert the poor soul or would you whip out your cell phone and start dialling for an ambulance?

.... my advice is if you reckon you're really indecisive, pick up another sport mate.

The give and take of criticism is the source of more anxiety than most any other type of interpersonal communication - so tread lightly. BUT, if you are sure they are doing it wrong, then you should say something. I learned to climb in the 70s, and back then there were two variations used depending on skill and circumstances. I would suggest something along the lines of "excuse me, i wonder if you could help me out with something? I was taught that the proper way to belay is ABC but i see that you are doing XYZ. Was i mistaught or is there an alternate method that you are using that i was not aware of?" It is possible that some instructor is just being lazy and using an ill advised short cut and you question will make him realize he is setting a bad example. It is also possible that the proliferation of mass marketed climbing walls is resulting in a lot of bad form - and accidents will follow.

Be selfish - if you did NOT do the right thing and there was an accident - you would feel bad. Avail yourself of the opportunity to live with a clean conscience and say something. Good luck.

I don't think it's an alternative method, for example: when both ropes are parallel, the person kind of keeps his hand too close to the belay device. Isn't there a great chance his hands would get stuck in the holes in case the person falls?

Should I tell the instructor one-on-one after everyone's gone or should I just tell the instructor in the person's presence?

.

Now you're starting to be silly, aren't you?

Quasi, Good point. Might have to call you "WIMPY" instead of "ROPEY." If you don't have the balls to sort this out, what are you doing rock climbing?

I am serious mate, I really think you should give some thought about switching to another sport. Not to sound discouraging but before something unfortunate happens...

Yeah but I wanna make sure I sort it out using the best way.

Should I tell the instructor one-on-one after everyone's gone or should I just tell the instructor in the person's presence?

what are the benefits of telling him in front of the other person? if you're right you make him look bad, and for what? ego dictates that he will justify what he's doing and once he's done that it will be hard for him to later tell the other person to do something different. and if you're wrong and he has a good reason why does the other person have to listen to both methods and get confused?

what harm is there telling him one-on-one? at worst he will not listen to you, but at least you gave him a fair chance and if you feel strongly about it then go straight to the organisation he represents and alert them to what's happening since your warning fell on deaf ears with him.

i'm quite curious. why do you find this such a difficult decision? what are your guiding principles in making decisions? cos if you're always this indecisive as you said then you have a bigger problem than what to do with your instructor. and i don't mean that in a critical way, more out of detached concern. you may want to think of a way forward or you may spend the rest of your life agonising over such details.

If you really believe what the instructor does with the rope could be dangerous, yes you should tell him...

Wind In My Hair wrote:what are the benefits of telling him in front of the other person? if you're right you make him look bad, and for what? ego dictates that he will justify what he's doing and once he's done that it will be hard for him to later tell the other person to do something different. and if you're wrong and he has a good reason why does the other person have to listen to both methods and get confused?

what harm is there telling him one-on-one? at worst he will not listen to you, but at least you gave him a fair chance and if you feel strongly about it then go straight to the organisation he represents and alert them to what's happening since your warning fell on deaf ears with him.

i'm quite curious. why do you find this such a difficult decision? what are your guiding principles in making decisions? cos if you're always this indecisive as you said then you have a bigger problem than what to do with your instructor. and i don't mean that in a critical way, more out of detached concern. you may want to think of a way forward or you may spend the rest of your life agonising over such details.

No, I wasn't talking about my instructor, but one or two other students who've been making the mistake. The instructor didn't teach them that.

I know what to do now, I'll just go and tell next time there's a lesson. But still I think it's better to tell the instructor in front of the student making mistakes? I hardly know that student's name.

Ropey, you're being thick, and are continuing to be thick.

oh sorry i misunderstood. but if it was a student making the mistake then what is the dilemma?

It's easy just say to him/her:"

"excuse me but I noticed that you are doing it this way, I thought my instructor told me to do it this way because it was safer - I just don't want to see you get hurt"

no big deal