Socialising/Groups for Seniors

[MLCK]

My elderly mother-in-law has just re-settled in Singapore and would like to widen her social circle among the expat community. Would anyone know of any venues or groups where senior expats meet?

[Matney]

I can't help as I haven't been here long myself, but what is considered a senior? AGE?

[MLCK]

I guess above 60 yrs old would be pretty senior

[Lois]

My elderly mother-in-law has just re-settled in Singapore and would like to widen her social circle among the expat community. Would anyone know of any venues or groups where senior expats meet?

Pity that she only wants to hang out with 'expats' or is that something you and your spouse encouraged because you are expats yourselves?

Ok i dont expect she will be happy hanging out at a HDB but why do the expats feel they must hang out with expats only? Something about being elite is it? Its an honest question.. really.. because ... i have always wondered but could never understand.

what are her interests?
How mobile is she?
What languages does she speak?
where did she live before and what did she do when she was there?


based on the above, i can them make some suggestions.

[dolby]

Lois I would say that it's not at all likely to do with being elite. It's more likely to do with being comfortable with people of similar interests and culture. You relate best to such people. That's not to say that you can't make the effort to meet people from other cultures etc, and in Singapore it's impossible not to, and it's great that you can meet loads of different people, but sometimes, it's the truth, you just want to spend time with someone from "home". It's not racist, it's just a comfort zone.

Maybe over time that comfort zone changes, so that you become better friends with people from other cultures too, and that's a good thing.

But it's not elitism as far as I see it. Elitism is "my people are better than yours", whereas if you've just moved somewhere, the feeling is "I can relax more when I'm with people who I can relate to".

Hope this helps dispel a popular misconception of expats.

[another guest]

Dolby,
Well said and summarised!! It's absolutely true that when you arrive here, knowing no-one, its comforting to start with people from a similar background, culture etc, it helps to get through the "oh my god, I feel completely lost and lonely " stage !! Once you've been here a few months your interaction with such a diverse population means that you automatically start to expand your social crowd.....elitism is a horrible concept, I don't know anyone that believes in this.

[MLCK]

Hi Lois

I understand it does sound somewhat racist/elitist, and I do feel that way too, esp since I'm Singaporean and not an expat. She's German and was living in Australia before coming over to Singapore recently. Being old and hence not as adaptable, she has troubling understanding the S'porean accent and Singlish. Also it is quite a culture shock coming to an Asian country where food, culture and customs are very different.

It's just a way of easing her into living in Singapore before she gradually gets accustomed to all things Singaporean and I'm sure in due time she would have Singaporean friends. After all, she does her groceries at the neigbourhood HDB mini mart despite the fact that she doesnt understand the shopkeepers and vice versa.

She's very mobile, can take the cab one her own. She speaks German and English. She enjoys food (mostly Continental) ie eating and cooking, shopping, gardening, reading. She's a retiree. Hope you would be kind enough to give some recommendations.

[Lois]

I have friends with parents that age or a bit older...who speak good english and i can ask around so that maybe she can mix with a few people at first... just so she can get comfortable.....

For a start...You might want to contact the German school and German club to ask about events they will be having... also the german embassy, the goethe insititute..

I think there are some gardening clubs here.. let me do some research and make some inquries..and come back to u with more info... as long is open...

[Lois]

Here's a website
http://www.gardeningsingapore.org/contact.htm

if you live in a condo, ask the managment if they know of other seniors there, organise a gathering

if you live in a house, look around yr neighbourhood, go for walks in the early evening, see who else is walking, make friends, then introduce yr mum in law

are u a member of any clubs...?ask them about seniors..even if u not a member, a good membership director should be able to accomodate etc.

I dont know if you are actually following up on this post here so I dont know if i should post other ideas which come to mind or would u like to give me yr email add to drop u a note as and when some info comes to me?

I have friends with parents that age or a bit older...who speak good english and i can ask around so that maybe she can mix with a few people at first... just so she can get comfortable.....

For a start...You might want to contact the German school and German club to ask about events they will be having... also the german embassy, the goethe insititute..

I think there are some gardening clubs here.. let me do some research and make some inquries..and come back to u with more info... as long is open...