Moving to Singapore

[cutio1979]

Hi Everyone,

I am originally from the UK and am currently living in Melbourne, Australia. My company has advised me that they wish to transfer me to Singapore from January 2010. I have no qualms about moving to Singapore having visited many times however I have had many people advise me that as a single, western girl I will struggle with a few social things, namely that (and I quote in loose terms a friend here) 'I can kiss any chance of dating or meeting someone goodbye'. Apparently I will be pretty much invisible if I move to Singapore!!

Given that I would be moving on my own I am keen to find out if I will struggle to make friends etc? Whilst my primary reason to move is for career progression I would not want to do it at a cost of a miserable and lonely social life so any feedback would be very much appreciated.

Thank you.

[nakatago]

Hello,

I'm guessing you were born in 1979. Don't fret about your social life; here's a couple of links:

Ladies in their 30's

Singles - bunch of people--both expats and locals around their 20's and 30's planning dinners and drinking, crashing into FNDC gatherings and hi-jacking threads in this forum. And we don't know each other before all the tomfoolery began--and more people we don't know are joining still. You're very, very much welcome to join in on the fun, even if you're still abroad.

And oh, we sometimes get serious too.

[D_Mika]

Well just like nakatago mentioned .. there are so many gathering and
definitely the best way to Socialize with a bigger network.. Don't worry, It will be much better than it sounds .

[nhrk]

i moved about 7 months ago from uk, although i've shuffled back and forth. in some ways, i regret my decision given my social circle is somewhat restricted and the life in singapore is really just hustle and bustle. it's rare you get to sit around, sip a cup of tea [how very english] and watch the world go by. it doesn't help that i'm a student either.

i'm 21 so i don't know if the dating situation would work similarly but i find it daunting a task to meet someone of the same wavelength as i, let alone one with emotional and intellectual chemistry. and even when i do... they're usually white men who have become so accustomed to asian women throwing themselves at them that they no longer care for proper intimate relationships and instead settle for one night stands. or, they're simply too caught up with work to have time. but that said, there prolly are worthy men lurking around if they're not married to their jobs and if you search hard enough.

i'm not at the stage where i'm dying for a relationship or any sort of amorous play - yet. but i'd say, do what you want, and what makes you wake up bursting with exuberance. never pick the prospects of finding a man above advancing your career. there are men everywhere really, and you're bound to find one, eventually. no woman needs a man to validate or complete her. he ought to complement you, for everything that you are and will be. never confine yourself to anything, especially men. cross the porous borders and live it up. it's your life, and today is all you'll ever have, make it everything you dreamed it would be. (:


ps; i'm sorry for the extremely lengthy post. i tend to get caught in the moment far too much, evidently.

[nakatago]

A guy's POV...

I'm actually socially inept, at least compared to the general population. My social life here in singers seems healthy enough for someone like me, who doesn't have women throwing themselves at me, so I guess someone like cutio1979 should have nothing to worry about having friends in such a cosmopolitan country.

Dating, though, is another story.

[mauvecloud]

yeah, with regards to making friends, i'm in agreement with the people above. as long as you're willing to get out of the house, you WILL meet people.

dating - errgh well. i do think things are kinda screwed up here, but not in the sense presented by one eloquent poster above.

women here* are brought up to see men as their main emotional, financial, and mental support. men here are no better in believing that their existence is validated by being money trees.

(i cant comment on "expat, white men" - the only white people i ever work with are in the academia, and some of the guys hyphenate their surnames upon marriage. yep. liberals, prolly tree-huggers.)

* 'here' : singapore, and prolly across the causeway as well.

[mpitty]

Hey

Canadian guy here, 27. I'm looking to meet up with some people in early December before I move into town in late January. I'm just looking for some people to hang out with. Shoot me a message when your in town and we could get a few people to meet up.

Cheers.

[rw81]

Singapore is great for socialising on pretty much any level, whatever you're into. Can't comment too much on the dating thing from a womans point of view, but I can't imagine it being too much of a problem.

I left the UK about 5 years ago and have worked in Caribbean and NZ before I arrived here and I think this is one of the most social places I've been to. I've joined a couple of social sports teams which have helped me make friends, but I know people here who have made friends through music groups, dance groups or just going and having a drink in the local!

I think as long as you are prepared to smile and say hello to people you'll not have any problems. And if you do, drop me a PM and I'll show you a few cool places around the city.

[nakatago]

Just a thought.

Considering how boring this country is as some people regard, people would naturally want to socialize, just to kill the tedium.

[steff77]

I heard people telling that here is no chance for white women to get a date all the time, so when I moved here in May this year from Europe, I was expecting a quite lonely time here in Singapore. But after a very short period I found out that it's not that way, and that not all men are only interested in 40 kg chinese girls wearing skirts which would better work as a belt. My friends are experiencing the same, so please be sure that there is a high chance for you to getting dates, as long as you leave the house and go out. But that's the precondition to meet people in every country in the world, I guess. If you have more questions regarding live in Singapore, especially when being 30 and above , please feel free to contact me at: [email protected]

Regards, Stefanie

[gt200]

hey nhrk...

you make the situation sound so bad. i believe it is not that bad either here in Singapore. Well im a local here too but i often do go for work travel to other countries. what you are experiencing are the same as other people visiting/working/immigrating to other country.

but im sure...once you are settle down, life would be much better.

anyway..if you prefer a quite place to chill out..try dempsey hill and i would recommend you to try chill out at sentosa beach at night.. it is a beautiful sight.

you can msn me [email protected]

[vbelle]

Hey cutio..

you will not be struggling making friends..if you do the effort obviously..i've met quite lots of friends through this forum..direct/indirectly..lots of people working away from home and their family and friends..and i think the locals don't mind mingle with international crowd too...

now as for dating..cant give opinion for that.. im not western girl..

[Gypsy Queen]

Hi Everyone,

I am originally from the UK and am currently living in Melbourne, Australia. My company has advised me that they wish to transfer me to Singapore from January 2010. I have no qualms about moving to Singapore having visited many times however I have had many people advise me that as a single, western girl I will struggle with a few social things, namely that (and I quote in loose terms a friend here) 'I can kiss any chance of dating or meeting someone goodbye'. Apparently I will be pretty much invisible if I move to Singapore!!

Given that I would be moving on my own I am keen to find out if I will struggle to make friends etc? Whilst my primary reason to move is for career progression I would not want to do it at a cost of a miserable and lonely social life so any feedback would be very much appreciated.

Thank you.

Hey there, as a single girl that came from the uk over 3 years ago I have to say that I dont regret my choice one bit! I have made lifetime friends here and seen places I never dreamt of seeing as well as progressing in my career and met many cute guys along the way so cant help but say that I think you have been given a little bit of bad advice! Every country or new place you visit is what you make of it and if you come here willing to be open and sociable and make a bit of effort to find your feet and new social circle you will do just fine! I used this forum a lot at ths start and met most of my closest friends so cant recommend it enough!
I dont think you will regret the move at all, I never have done! Good luck! x

[irvine]

While OP's concern is true to some point... fret not, in fact there are many things to do in Singapore. Sports, sea sports, parties, new friends, nature, museums, volunteer work, Singapore international foundation activities, cultures.. and of course, the many budget airlines available from Singapore to Asian destinations - you'll be thrilled!

[mymarikit]

no worries you can join us anytime. keep in touch. email me when your here and i will keep you updated of the latest happenings. [email protected]