Looking for uhmm.. I'm not really sure.

[sierra2469alpha]

@QRM: Chalk it up to quarter life crisis. Remember when macaroonie when through a similar thing not a long while ago?

I guess it will happen if you live in a country when they have a word for people afraid of losing out, where expats are either there on assignment, looking for greener pastures or want a change of environment, in a corporate culture known for the rat race.

You go life through that, you tend to miss out certain things in life. And you usually don't realize it but when you do, it triggers a panic attack in varying degrees of severity from person to person.

Well written, Nakatago - an intersting philosophy. However, some points of interest (not difference, INTEREST)...

Is corporate culture really the "rat race". Many have written such opinions. Back in one of my old careers, flying a left seat of a Boeing, I thought it was a rat-race, sometimes. Crap hours, bad pay. Then, moving along, I realised that it was (which I think you are alluding to), just my personal assessment at the time. Correct me if I may be mistaken.

Having then done the jungle-monkey/rat-race/corporate-cr&p, owning own businesses, et. al., I will again agree with you - some people do not realise the differences.

This is an intersting thread and I look forward to hearing everyone's thoughts.

@twinsing - nice to see someone who writes well along with the usual regulars!

Mr. P.

[nakatago]

@QRM: Chalk it up to quarter life crisis. Remember when macaroonie when through a similar thing not a long while ago?

I guess it will happen if you live in a country when they have a word for people afraid of losing out, where expats are either there on assignment, looking for greener pastures or want a change of environment, in a corporate culture known for the rat race.

You go life through that, you tend to miss out certain things in life. And you usually don't realize it but when you do, it triggers a panic attack in varying degrees of severity from person to person.

Well written, Nakatago - an intersting philosophy. However, some points of interest (not difference, INTEREST)...

Is corporate culture really the "rat race".

Not the corporate culture but in a corporate culture. in asia, most of the time...and a lot of anecdotes from others who work here in singers.

I used to work in a Japanese corporation...now in a European one. Felt a big difference!

[sundaymorningstaple]

I actually escaped the corporate rat race for almost 2 decades (early mid-life crises?). Unfortunately I'm swept back up in it again probably for the duration. (fortunately, I think the duration has it''s limitations here as I'm now 63). But I gave up the rat race back in 1976 and became a commercial diver (which is a glorified ditch digger that just uses a different method of transport to get to and from work). For the better part of the next 2 decades I was retired, doing what I used to pay people to let me do, but now they were paying me good money to do it. Oh well, age does have a way of creeping up on you so nearing 50 I stepped back into a corporate type of world again rather unwillingly.

Now I'm nearing my three-quarter life crises!

[myzhelle]

I think it's good to take some time and reflect on things that really matter to us, being able to speak our minds, even at the slightest chance we get, could feel really liberating, so go ahead people! (",)

@twinsing- i guess we agree on a lot of things, i do understand how you feel. i think it gets harder and harder to meet 'real friends' these days, those that really see you and go out of their way to get to know you, because we are living in a very fast-phased, fast-changing extremely active and competitive environment and we all try to cope with this so-called rat race, but sometimes, if you're not careful, you might lose yourself along the process, trying so hard to be what the majority dictates as 'cool and hip'.. oh well.. whatever.. there can be an endless explanation for this, but i guess we don't always have to find reason for everything or overanalyze things,otherwise we'll go nuts! (you wouldn't want that don't you?(",)) but hey, don't get me wrong, i also know how to party, get along great with other people, can be one of the coolest girl in town for all you know (haha!.. well, i might be abit exagerating,but you get the point right?(",)), but that these doesn't stop me from being aware of the things around me and noticing the things that are missing and lacking, and hoping that we can make it better. I guess being 'cool' is not about just being candid and shallow, as with what some people might mistake it to be. it's a whole lot more.. and more.. How would you define cool, anywayz? oh well..

Sorry, i still can't make private messages at the moment.. so here's my email add: [email protected]. looking forward to hear from you soon.(",)

Have a great nyt..

Michelle

[Raghu-a]

Hi Angel Joy...I'm passionate about music..I'm not sure what I can add to your group (of musicians) coz I can sing only Indian (bollywood) songs, but sure I think I can learn from and have a good time with you and ur friends...I always had/have the desire to form a band but couldn't till now....I'm sure it will take years but if I put in my efforts I think surely i will get close to it soon.

Myzhelle..as you said, sometimes I prefer sitting alone somewhere (mostly on beachside) and keep thinking as to what exactly do I need and it really makes me feel better and focused..

TwinSing and Michelle.....it would be great to meet up sometime

I can't PM anybody as yet... pls drop a line at [email protected]

[AngelJoy]

okay to make you all relax for a bit.
go read Aaron Karo's Ruminations on Twentysomething Life.

[kotheman]

lol this is a very interesting topic, i think many of us can go on and on about it.

How about we, all meetin up for something...I'd like to have everyone onboard on a relaxing afternoon/evening, some BBQ maybe around east coast park?:roll: ?. Anyone up for it? (Just a thought)

cheers
Ko

[myzhelle]

It's such a lovely, bright and shiny day today.. don't you think so?(",) well, i guess it wouldn't hurt to 'start your day with a smile and end it with giggle'. life can be hard at times and not all the time people/friends are on your side and you might even start feeling abit lost and isolated, but i think there's a greater,brighter an absolutely awesome side of life that has alot of great things to offer and actually make us happy, but it's all up to you which side of life you want to see and choose to be in it. i think happiness and finding real friends/ loveones is a choice,not just a plain state of mind. if we choose to see the brighter side of life and appreciate the great things that it has to offer, rather than finding flaws in every little thing until you drown yourself in misery, i think we're in the right track and on our way to finding whatever it is that we really want. the only thing that can get in the way of everything is YOU, so loosen up and give me that smile, will ya? (",)

@angeljoy- my greatest passion is music, and its nice to know that there are people like you who feels the same way, and you're lucky to have found good friends that share the same passion as you. i used to play the guitar and the drums and write some songs,jam sessions with some cool bands every once in awhile,and watch alot of great concerts last time, but a different and busy line of work and not having friends with the same passion in music, can really get in the way at times. i still feel the same passion, but i guess being able to share and enjoy it with people who also appreciate and enjoy it would be absolutely awesome! (",)

oopps.. back to work soon.. have a great day people (",)

[carteki]

In some respects I feel your pain - and being in an environment like Singapore is not conducive to building long term real relationships. I have an instance where I can go to some effort to "mend" a relationship - but I know that the people concerned are leaving in 6 / so months and I really just can't be bothered to make the effort just to have them leave. There is also the added instability of work permit issues and "how long you'll be allowed to stay" which makes people more insular.

I guess my way of coping with this is to keep on making new friends by participating in activities that I enjoy. Some will stick, others will pass - and just to enjoy myself in the meantime.

[AngelJoy]

@angeljoy- my greatest passion is music, and its nice to know that there are people like you who feels the same way, and you're lucky to have found good friends that share the same passion as you. i used to play the guitar and the drums and write some songs,jam sessions with some cool bands every once in awhile,and watch alot of great concerts last time, but a different and busy line of work and not having friends with the same passion in music, can really get in the way at times. i still feel the same passion, but i guess being able to share and enjoy it with people who also appreciate and enjoy it would be absolutely awesome! (",)

yeppppppp!
high five!

i'm writing music articles freelance for magazines and of coz me myself a 100% concert maniac.that's why i dont really care how much i spend on records,concerts.
all the adventures i've done for the love of music,make me kinda proud.and it does change the way i think the way i live.
that's something that keeps me going no matter how life is.

[anupbalagopal]

@twinsing: I am able to relate to your feelings.. I have been in Singapore since 2 months and been part of a few random meetup events. I have met a lot of new people here, but unable to connect to any. Most events usually have too many people and its almost impossible to have a proper conversation and find like minded people..

Unlike you.. I know what I am looking for.. I am looking for like minded people.. But I don't know how to get to them..

It was nice reading your posts

[sundaymorningstaple]

Unlike you.. I know what I am looking for.. I am looking for like minded people.. But I don't know how to get to them..

And there, my friend, is your problem. You are looking for like minded people so there is no way you will ever meet them. If they are like minded, that means they ALSO don't know how to get to them....

[intellectualsmuse]

Unlike you.. I know what I am looking for.. I am looking for like minded people.. But I don't know how to get to them..

And there, my friend, is your problem. You are looking for like minded people so there is no way you will ever meet them. If they are like minded, that means they ALSO don't know how to get to them....

Whatever happened to the Law of Attraction? You sure aren't a fan of Rhonda Byrne's theories@SMS

I will have to agree that deeper and meaningful relationships are difficult to come by and being in a new country doesn't make things any easier. However, the only way out is to keep doing new things and look for opportunities where you can meet people who share similar interests. And while you're at it, appreciate the things you already have...no point tying your happiness to the singular goal of "finding good friends". Enjoy the ride !

[QRM]

I will have to agree that deeper and meaningful relationships are difficult to come by and being in a new country doesn't make things any easier. !

I found its the opposite, coming to a new country means you really can start with a clean slate, no past baggage I have met and still in touch with a number of great friends in countries where I was just on a brief assignment.

Alot of it does depends on the mental make up the general population, in the US you can be best buddies with a person by the end of a lift ride.

I would have to say the general observation that the Singaporeans are not the easiest of people to get long with, is probably true. Strangely enough my local Singaporean chums are actually originally from Malaysia. The further north you go the more easy going the people are.

[sundaymorningstaple]

I would tend to agree. I was a twice divorced single guy when I arrived here back in '82 and I was soured on marriage needless to say. I figured I'd come over here and just have a ball with all the lbfms. Well, life has a way of throwing you curve balls when you not really looking or expecting them. I've been married here now for over 27 years. I'd have to say you CAN find meaningful relationships here IF you allow them to happen.