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Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

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Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by malcontent » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:40 pm

Do you consider Singapore home? This was an interesting question posed in an expat interview I saw recently. Those who have been here long enough will at least consider it a second home. For me it is my adopted home - because I moved here (more or less) for good back in 1996.. though oddly enough, I’m still on an EP — which I have to admit, feels weird.

After more than half of my life here, Singapore is very much my home.. as much as (perhaps even more than) my original home back in the US where I was born and raised. One indicator.. when I travel overseas and people ask me where I’m from, I say Singapore. This either evokes stunned silence or more questions.

What about you?
Last edited by malcontent on Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:44 pm

That is odd, Mal. Any reason you haven't applied for PR?

For me, I consider singapore to be a second home. I don't think any place can fully replace my hometown, but I've been here for so long that sometimes I forget about the states.

Well, I do have many local friends now, eat local food, and I'm comfortable understanding, local slang, there is a part of me that will always feel a little bit like an outsider. I don't think I'm alone in this sentiment though.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by smoulder » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:52 pm

Without a doubt, Singapore is home for me. I have my own apartment, I'm now a citizen and so are my wife and daughter. My insurance is purchased here and I intend to retire here.

Having said that, like Lisa said, I still feel a little like an outsider and will probably always. While it is possible that I might eventually sound somewhat Singaporean, I will never look that way physically. There are other factors too obviously - growing up here vs not makes a big difference. My wife is ex Malaysian and also doesn't feel completely Singaporean. I think this is a given for first generation immigrants - the 2nd generation will be different.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:59 pm

smoulder wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:52 pm
Without a doubt, Singapore is home for me. I have my own apartment, I'm now a citizen and so are my wife and daughter. My insurance is purchased here and I intend to retire here.

Having said that, like Lisa said, I still feel a little like an outsider and will probably always. While it is possible that I might eventually sound somewhat Singaporean, I will never look that way physically. There are other factors too obviously - growing up here vs not makes a big difference. My wife is ex Malaysian and also doesn't feel completely Singaporean. I think this is a given for first generation immigrants - the 2nd generation will be different.
There are plenty of Indian Singaporeans, though I understand what you mean.

Not having grown up here doesn't make a big difference. A couple years back my daughter was telling me about how the NAPFA test was coming up, didn't have a clue what she was talking about.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by smoulder » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 2:10 pm

Lisafuller wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:59 pm
smoulder wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:52 pm
Without a doubt, Singapore is home for me. I have my own apartment, I'm now a citizen and so are my wife and daughter. My insurance is purchased here and I intend to retire here.

Having said that, like Lisa said, I still feel a little like an outsider and will probably always. While it is possible that I might eventually sound somewhat Singaporean, I will never look that way physically. There are other factors too obviously - growing up here vs not makes a big difference. My wife is ex Malaysian and also doesn't feel completely Singaporean. I think this is a given for first generation immigrants - the 2nd generation will be different.
There are plenty of Indian Singaporeans, though I understand what you mean.

Not having grown up here doesn't make a big difference. A couple years back my daughter was telling me about how the NAPFA test was coming up, didn't have a clue what she was talking about.
I don't look Indian. So it's hard to fit in with my "own" race.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by Lisafuller » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 2:11 pm

Oh, gotcha. Well, I guess one nice thing is the fact that singapore is so multicultural that many locals look ethnically ambiguous. It will be much tougher to fit in somewhere ethnically homogenous like Japan.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by malcontent » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 2:19 pm

Lisafuller wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:44 pm
That is odd, Mal. Any reason you haven't applied for PR?

For me, I consider singapore to be a second home. I don't think any place can fully replace my hometown, but I've been here for so long that sometimes I forget about the states.

Well, I do have many local friends now, eat local food, and I'm comfortable understanding, local slang, there is a part of me that will always feel a little bit like an outsider. I don't think I'm alone in this sentiment though.
I did apply for PR back in 1999 but it was rejected. I never really gave it much thought after that, and didn’t see a benefit in doing so. My wife is a PR, so we just put everything in her name. If my EP were ever to get rejected, I guess I’d switch to LTVP.

My employer has always provided a substitute for anyone who isn’t eligible for CPF, but at the same time they force me to contribute to social security as a US citizen. Having both 7.65% FICA and 20% CPF deducted was always a daunting prospect. And since I’ve stuck with the same employer all these years, I haven’t needed job portability.

I used to feel like an outsider, but any local who gets to know me is usually quick to accept. Especially after knowing how long I’ve been here… anyone born after 1996 — I’ve been here longer than they have, and I’ve never been on an expat package (local all the way) that earns me some street cred.
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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by jalanjalan » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:16 pm

It became home for me right away, partly because of my SG-born spouse, in-laws and large extended family and the almost entirely local-born friends I made at work. Also because I got PR very quickly - less than a year after arriving. An expat family friend once said to me that some countries just wrap themselves around you. That pretty much describes Singapore for me.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by malcontent » Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:46 pm

jalanjalan wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:16 pm
It became home for me right away, partly because of my SG-born spouse, in-laws and large extended family and the almost entirely local-born friends I made at work. Also because I got PR very quickly - less than a year after arriving. An expat family friend once said to me that some countries just wrap themselves around you. That pretty much describes Singapore for me.
You are fortunate. I still remember my first 24 hours in Singapore back in Oct, 1996. It was the first international flight of my life, I flew alone and it was a one-way trip (I had a 6 month open ended return flight, but no intention of using it, and never did). Two checked bags plus a carry-on is all that I moved here with.

First it was the wall of humidity that hit me getting off the plane. Next, how “unstrict” it was to get through customs (despite my preconceptions). Then in the taxi, speeding most of the way, with the “ding dong” sound (those who were around back then will know). I was thrust into a lease agreement for an HDB room rental and had to figure out how to take the public bus on my own without any help (I’d never taken public transport in my life!). I eventually had chicken rice with barley (drink) that evening. Needless to say, it was full on emersion right from the start! The only welcome I got was from my SO, and we would end up not being able to marry for 7 years after I moved here. Just another one of life’s challenges.
If someone succeeds in provoking you, realize that your mind is complicit in the provocation - Epictetus

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by Lisafuller » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 12:45 am

jalanjalan wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:16 pm
It became home for me right away, partly because of my SG-born spouse, in-laws and large extended family and the almost entirely local-born friends I made at work. Also because I got PR very quickly - less than a year after arriving. An expat family friend once said to me that some countries just wrap themselves around you. That pretty much describes Singapore for me.
Wow, how'd you manage to get PR so soon?

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by jalanjalan » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 10:18 am

malcontent wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:46 pm
You are fortunate. I still remember my first 24 hours in Singapore back in Oct, 1996. It was the first international flight of my life, I flew alone and it was a one-way trip (I had a 6 month open ended return flight, but no intention of using it, and never did). Two checked bags plus a carry-on is all that I moved here with.

First it was the wall of humidity that hit me getting off the plane. Next, how “unstrict” it was to get through customs (despite my preconceptions). Then in the taxi, speeding most of the way, with the “ding dong” sound (those who were around back then will know). I was thrust into a lease agreement for an HDB room rental and had to figure out how to take the public bus on my own without any help (I’d never taken public transport in my life!). I eventually had chicken rice with barley (drink) that evening. Needless to say, it was full on emersion right from the start! The only welcome I got was from my SO, and we would end up not being able to marry for 7 years after I moved here. Just another one of life’s challenges.
Yes I was fortunate to have a support network. It made a huge difference. I too remember the wall of humidity! I was like "is that really the outside air?"
I didn't have much trouble with public transport, though flagging down the bus was a new experience for me. I just copied what the aunties did. My first hawker experience was hokkien mee made by a very sweaty uncle in a singlet. I was pretty blur, but I had relatives to lead me around so I could just enjoy myself looking at all the new things.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by jalanjalan » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 10:41 am

Lisafuller wrote:
Fri, 21 Apr 2023 12:45 am
Wow, how'd you manage to get PR so soon?
I suppose because I am wife of a Singaporean. I don't remember much about the interview but I guess they also concluded it wasn't a marriage of convenience (we celebrate our 29th this year so they were correct!). Also, this was in '95, and jobs were plentiful.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by malcontent » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 2:08 pm

jalanjalan wrote:
Fri, 21 Apr 2023 10:18 am
malcontent wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 10:46 pm
You are fortunate. I still remember my first 24 hours in Singapore back in Oct, 1996. It was the first international flight of my life, I flew alone and it was a one-way trip (I had a 6 month open ended return flight, but no intention of using it, and never did). Two checked bags plus a carry-on is all that I moved here with.

First it was the wall of humidity that hit me getting off the plane. Next, how “unstrict” it was to get through customs (despite my preconceptions). Then in the taxi, speeding most of the way, with the “ding dong” sound (those who were around back then will know). I was thrust into a lease agreement for an HDB room rental and had to figure out how to take the public bus on my own without any help (I’d never taken public transport in my life!). I eventually had chicken rice with barley (drink) that evening. Needless to say, it was full on emersion right from the start! The only welcome I got was from my SO, and we would end up not being able to marry for 7 years after I moved here. Just another one of life’s challenges.
Yes I was fortunate to have a support network. It made a huge difference. I too remember the wall of humidity! I was like "is that really the outside air?"
I didn't have much trouble with public transport, though flagging down the bus was a new experience for me. I just copied what the aunties did. My first hawker experience was hokkien mee made by a very sweaty uncle in a singlet. I was pretty blur, but I had relatives to lead me around so I could just enjoy myself looking at all the new things.
Reminds me of this big lady who used to whip me up a mean fried rice for $3… generous portion too. It was at a coffee shop across the street from where I lived on Balestier. Back then I had to order in Chinese, they really didn’t know a lick of English… and I also had to accept the “extra seasoning” from her sweat. Bo pien hor!
If someone succeeds in provoking you, realize that your mind is complicit in the provocation - Epictetus

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by x9200 » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 3:26 pm

malcontent wrote:
Thu, 20 Apr 2023 1:40 pm
Do you consider Singapore home? This was an interesting question posed in an expat interview I saw recently. Those who have been here long enough will at least consider it a second home. For me it is my adopted home - because I moved here (more or less) for good back in 1996.. though oddly enough, I’m still on an EP — which I have to admit, feels weird.

After more than half of my life here, Singapore is very much my home.. as much as (perhaps even more than) my original home back in the US where I was born and raised. One indicator.. when I travel overseas and people ask me where I’m from, I say Singapore. This either evokes stunned silence or more questions.

What about you?
It feels like home. But my old home (Poland) still feels like home too. Singapore feels a safe, familiar place, place you know everything around, like many of its flavors, feel comfortable and appreciate what Singapore can offer. But in Poland it is by immersion, clicking in by culture and language and perhaps nostalgia to some extent too. I actually never got detached by most of the ways. My wife detached more significantly. When we are back I can understand current references (to politics, advertisements, market, products, jokes etc.), she often doesn't.

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Re: Is Singapore ‘home’ for you?

Post by Addadude » Fri, 21 Apr 2023 5:09 pm

I have now lived longer in Singapore than in my 'home' country. Singapore started feeling like home after just a few years for me. I really started noticing this when, after a trip back 'hone', the plane would touch down in Changi and I'd feel this sense of coming home. Will I ever really 'fit in' here? Probably not. But it still feels like home to me.
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