Pissed About Maid Treatment, Again!

[Strong Eagle]

This is about the 5,005th time I have seen this, and it just chaps my ass.

Family dining at Newton Circus. Mommy. Daddy. Grandma. Grandpa. Sister and husband. Two kiddies. Food and drinks all over the table... except for the maid... who has zero... zilch... not even a glass of water in front of her. But, fully expected to keep the kids in tow.

What is with these zeroes? How f*cking clueless can one be? How bloody insensitive can one be? How much of a stinking pr*ck can one be to not recognize that the maid is human, too? How humiliating for the maid.

This is way beyond the first time I've seen such boorish behavior... way too many times at Sunday brunch at way too many venues. I've had to be restrained by my wife to keep me from getting up and chewing out these assh*le nincompoops.

[/rant off]

[Plavt]

[nakatago]

bloated sense of entitlement = douchey behavior

[ksl]

It's really deplorable, and I believe it is rampant in Singapore, there is no sense of humanity in slavery, and it's time Singapore stamped it out, it is disgraceful.

There are some Singaporeans that have set up an help line for maids though I cannot remember the link.

Though the word is familiarity breeds contempt within the maids, that is what they are afraid of. They are treated as servants like in the old colonial days, there is this irony of aloofness, that is quite shameful in this day and age. Really sad but its culture with a twist

[teck21]

It's really deplorable, and I believe it is rampant in Singapore, there is no sense of humanity in slavery, and it's time Singapore stamped it out, it is disgraceful.

Stamp it out? This government relies on slavery and promotes it, of course the people follow.

There's this ma'am I know, who has fired, or been fired by every single one of her domestic helpers over the past 3 years. A couple have run away.

The Manpower ministry has sent her to numerous courses on 'how to foster a good relationship with her maid'. She has gone to MoM for two interviews to determine whether she is suited to hiring a domestic helper.

At no point has any single one of the maids been interviewed or asked any questions about why they left.

Outcome of latest interview: waiting for paperwork to be processed and a new slave delivered.

It seems in Singapore one can deprive a domestic helper of food, call her pig brain all day (especially if she is Muslim) or deprive them of days off (we're paying them for the days they aren't llowed to go off, of course they prefer it!) and still be considered a good employer so long as one does not starve them to death or give them a kung fu kick in the stomach.

But look at how the words and actions of the governing bodies here towards every other class of foreign labour (not including 'expats' of course, who are to be used and abused in different ways)?

Is it any wonder the people deem it fit to treat their domestic helpers the same way?

Strangely enough, though, I do think it's mostly the middle class (who have very stressed and angst-filled lives in Singapore) who are the most guilty of mistreatment of maids.

I have been oppressed, I have been abused, I have climbed out of it so it's your turn to eat sh1t. Maybe this is just a common Asian mindset that might take generations to change.

Perhaps the treatment of slaves here would be marvelled at even a highly educated person living in the West (or what we call it now) 200 years ago.

My own somewhat extreme take of the situation.

Edited: many times for mind changing!

[longstebe]

Absolute sad bastards.
What gets me is that having spent some time in a 3rd world country where most of the maids are from, these people would give you the shirt off there backs.

Makes me sick. My mother would go nuts if she had seen that.

OP, you got me all pissed off now.

[carlos hathcock]

The only time I've seen a maid in a restaurant she was eating along with the large family. So I felt quite happy.

The the server dropped a ton of chips and dips all over here and the baby, ketchup and mustard everywhere. The poor girl.

Restaurant staff ran around the IMM mall to purchase alternative clothes for the maid. It did occur to me that if that had happened in Europe, the restaurant wouldn't have bothered.

Hope this tale makes you have a happier day.

From my POV we wouldn't treat a maid as any different mostly because "DO YOU WANT A DISAFFECTED MAID LOOKING AFTER YOUR CHILDREN"??

[sundaymorningstaple]

^^^^^

That takes too much thought in an area of the brain they are not used to using. Instead, they treat 'em like crap and then buy CCTV and put 'em all over the house to catch the maid as she finally snaps and starts taking it out on the kids. They never think that maybe, just maybe, they are the cause of the stress that causes maid to snap.

[Plavt]

^
They aren't the only ones; plenty of cases of a similar nature in America if you care to read certain book(s) which are doutless accurate.

[rickjames]

^
They aren't the only ones; plenty of cases of a similar nature in America if you care to read certain book(s) which are doutless accurate.

So? What does this have to do with anything in Singapore and the ill treatment of other human beings here? In your eyes, does this excuse this behavior because it goes on somewhere else? Puhlease!!!

Generally speaking, Asians usually do not treat others who they view as socially-economically 'below' them, very well- from Asia Minor to SE Asia and everywhere along the way (almost). A 'servant' or helper seems to get the worse treatment. It makes me wonder about a culture/society/person etc where there is a such a lack of basic respect for others.

[Plavt]

So? What does this have to do with anything in Singapore and the ill treatment of other human beings here? In your eyes, does this excuse this behavior because it goes on somewhere else? Puhlease!!!

First of all I never said anything to excuse the behaviour in Singapore. Sms in his post at least is simply singling out Singaoreans. My point is and like it or not it is a fact maid abuse is not confined to Singapore or Singaporeans.

[daytripper65]

I have a family member visiting who just made the same observation- whole family out to eat, food and drinks flowing and nothing for the maid. He was appalled. At the same time, we are in a difficult situation with our helper. She was a transfer maid, and started out fantastic. Actually she is still very good with housework and preparing meals, and has a good outgoing personality. But after a month or two I started to notice cash going missing- 2 hong baos ($600+), emergency money I keep in car, money in pockets not being returned from laundry, etc. Then items, such as things I buy in bulk when on sale, bags of candy my husband brings back from overseas, as well as helping herself to my expensive candles for her bathroom. Because she is good with other things, and possibly because I tend to avoid confrontation, I let this go for months. Then I had stuck some money for a library fee for my son in a directory on my bedside cabinet to use the following day, but it was GONE the next day. She doesn't even dust the cabinet so she must rifle through everything on a daily. Finally I had just had ENOUGH and confronted her about everything. She didn't deny it, she just said "I'm very sorry mam," with her head hung. Friends and neighbors have unanimously advised us to get rid of her NOW, and not pass her on either, just re-patriate her. My husband and I are having a very hard time coming to terms with that, however, and have decided to give her a second chance. We told her if it happens again we will let her go. We are both very generous people and if she has any problems or concerns, including her salary (which is pretty high), she can always come to us (which she does in fact when she needs an advance). If there is a next time, which I honestly hope there isn't but I have a sickening sense there will be, we will have no choice but to let her go. In any case, my real question is, her passport is expiring in May and she said she needs a 2 year employment contract to renew it and needs to get going in January. I was hoping to keep her on "probation" for lack of a better term to see if there are any more infractions until closer to the end of her contract in May, but now we have to make the decision quicker than we wanted to. If we do extend her for 2 years and then have another incident, is there some sort of "assumption of risk" clause that would bind us to the contract since it would be a renewal? If I bring this up to an employment agency I'm afraid they would simply advise us to file a police report or send her back, no further questions asked. Any other thoughts, advise, or similar experiences on this matter? Thank you.

[ksl]

You need to be extremely firm and make the maid pay all the money back, no if's or but's.
The money will still be in the room, if she doesn't send it home with POSB transfer.

You must not just accept what has happened, she is remorseful, but maybe laughing at you. You need to take control otherwise she will take control for you.

Tell her you have discussed with the authorities over the missing money and that you have been advised to not let it go...Make her own up to every penny stolen and make her pay it back.

You can then start from scratch, she will be very worried as it's not that easy to get to work for expatriates, so be firm but fair, if she starts to slack, find out why maybe she is homesick or not well...But you really need to show her that you are in control.

We have had the same problem the first year, they become clever enough to wait until guests are there, before taking anything knowing that you cannot blame her, while others have been there.

It's a very bad mistake to let her keep the money she has stolen and your credibility to have control is at risk.

So foot down and make her pay up, threaten her with termination will do very little, as the agency doesn't really care, plenty of other agencies around that can earn money on her.

Give her a good talking too, and tell her one more time, and it will be a police report, and if that happens she will be banned from Singapore.

[Edroche]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6kqvZx1Bzw&feature=fvw
If that link doesnt work search youtube for 'The Maid Trade - Singapore'

I saw this yesterday and I'll just put it out here for viewing but it's not pretty. I'm quite sure the drivers that are abusing their maids are to some extent unaware that what they are doing is wrong, this is the most disturbing fact. This goes beyond sad, its sinister. Plus why does everyone need a full time HDB maid now? Whatever happened to playing with your own kid on the play ground?

[Eau2011]

This is about the 5,005th time I have seen this, and it just chaps my ass.

Family dining at Newton Circus. Mommy. Daddy. Grandma. Grandpa. Sister and husband. Two kiddies. Food and drinks all over the table... except for the maid... who has zero... zilch... not even a glass of water in front of her. But, fully expected to keep the kids in tow.

What is with these zeroes? How f*cking clueless can one be? How bloody insensitive can one be? How much of a stinking pr*ck can one be to not recognize that the maid is human, too? How humiliating for the maid.

This is way beyond the first time I've seen such boorish behavior... way too many times at Sunday brunch at way too many venues. I've had to be restrained by my wife to keep me from getting up and chewing out these assh*le nincompoops.

[/rant off]

I suppose they are singaporean?

So-called English educated Chinese, they talk English, but don't mean they know much about human rights and equality....

Sad...